Holidays – or vacations, if you prefer – represent many different things to people. For some, it’s all about the aesthetic. For others, it’s the pursuit of history or adventure.
For me, since 2021, it has mostly involved what I do with the dog. The UK’s civil aviation authority seems fit to impose the most curious rules; one may fly out of the UK with a sub-nine kilogram hound in the cabin, but one may not return under those same conditions. Therefore, should you wish to have your furred friend accompany you on your holiday, you’re going to have to find other ways to travel. Ever to the rescue? LeShuttle.
LeShuttle has been a fixture in the UK to France movement of people and goods for almost 25 years, first seeing passengers in May 1994. Some 90 million vehicles have been estimated to have used the service. Movement with pets is integral to their service, having transported over two million cats and dogs since the year 2000.
With that in mind, a European adventure was planned: a jaunt down to the family house just south of Valencia, stopping at various points en route towards an overnight in Bordeaux and then onwards to Adsubia. It was a journey I made, again with the dog, in late April of last year in preparation for my wedding. On that occasion, buoyed by podcasts and enviable weather and road conditions, I made that 1,227 mile journey in a single 17 and three-quarter hour blast, fuel and ablutions stops only. This journey, however, was not that journey. This time I aimed at taking in more of the surroundings before enjoying a five-week stretch in Spain, and therefore needed a supreme all-purpose vehicle that would cover all that may be required for such a trip. Emails were sent, dates were booked, and the oft-forgotten Land Rover Discovery 5 was booked.
The Land Rover Discovery line has been a feature of the automotive landscape for just a little longer than the tunnel we would be taking, having first been launched in 1989. I remember taking a test drive of one of the first cars with my father. He was driving. I was eight. It’s a model that has retained its industrial roots but merged modern luxuries in an unpretentious way. Whereas the Range Rover has progressed to a luxury flagship, the Discovery very much remains in the category of ‘workhorse luxury’. No matter where you go in the day – mud, hills, water etc – with a jetwash and wipe, it wouldn’t look out of place pulling into the forecourt of The Berkley.
People often quote the phrase, ‘a Jack of all trades, a master of none’, but few finish the phrase properly. The whole phrase is ‘a jack of all trades but a master of none, is oft’ times better than a master of one’. This is the automotive representation of that. A car for, quite literally, all seasons.
So those wonderful folks at Land Rover provided the steed, and more on that in a bit. The route was planned: quick shot to Folkstone, early train, get going. Head down. Another quirk of the post-Brexit UK is that the Pet Passport system formally in place is now recognised in the UK but no longer issued. Having an address in Spain means I can circumvent this by having a Pet Passport through Spain. This means the crossing and associated administration are at a real minimum. Formerly, one would require a veterinary-issued health certificate, itself seemingly a racket by the combined force of the UK veterinary industry. But all one needs is pre-check-in, visit the Pet Reception block, show either the Pet Passport or your health certificate (which is verified when the pet’s microchip is checked), and one is – special car tag in hand – off to the proverbial races. This is a service that isn’t simply restricted to the smallest of dogs, or pets for that matter. All manner of many-legged friends make their way through the reception area, with all eyes peeled for puddles.
One can book a flexible ticket through LeShuttle, which essentially means one can arrive at any point on the booked day and make their way onto the next departing train. Efficiency is an understatement. Yes, there can be queues at both immigration points. Yes, I have previously been stopped for a random search, but on the whole, the process is simple and hassle-free. There are even toilet facilities whilst one may be queuing for one’s train. With the dog attended to, let us board.
The Discovery’s heft secures us a ground floor berth and we trundle carefully down the gangways. Fear not, this is a go everywhere car, and remarkably easy to place on the road, off it, or through a train. 30 short minutes later, one is supplanted on French soil in Calais and the real business begins.
So, the car. As the name would allude to, this is the fifth generation of the Discovery. That’s slightly confusing as the first and second generations were visually very similar, as were the third and fourth generations. The fifth generation really moved the needle forward with the model, as the brand seeks to delineate the model ranges more definitively than perhaps they have been previously. With the Discovery still available as a commercial variant, work is very much at the heart of the model, but with a selection of trim levels available, you can create a product that does feel distinctly luxurious in ride, design and comfort. As the first Discovery built on a unibody chassis, there’s greater torsional rigidity despite it weighing less, and improved ground clearance meaning better comfort across the most troublesome of terrain. The drivetrain and trim provided for the circa seven-week ‘road trip’ was the D350 HSE Dynamic, which, special editions aside, sits atop the Discovery pyramid. An Ingenium Three litre, six-cylinder mild hybrid diesel provides the propulsion, and that means – even with that aforementioned heft – the Discovery can get to 100km/h in sub six seconds, all while seating up to seven and carrying scary amounts of dog accessories. It could probably accomplish that in mud, on gravel or through the snow. Our example was painted Varesine Blue which I am certain used to be Byron Blue, but that’s for another day.
As alluded to, the plan for day one was to see us down to Bordeaux for a night stopover. That, from Calais, is some 839km, not the 1974km of my previous escapade so eminently achievable. With a high vantage point, a huge infotainment screen providing Apple CarPlay (and therefore access to the beloved Waze), kilometres passed in a blur. A 100-litre tank meant fill-ups were spaced at big intervals, which meant they tallied well with the need for drinks or comfort breaks for all three of us in the car. In fairness, the dog was probably the least demanding. The French penchant for pace was also welcome, with the Autoroute being privy to 130km/h speed limits. With EU speedo variances given a 7% tolerance, that means 85 is cruising speed… and thus, great progress was made. We stopped for the longest stop in Orleans, a lovely town that runs along the banks of the Loire. We walked the dog along the water, coffee in hand for a welcome stretch of the legs. Muscled relieved, bladders likewise, we returned for the final passage into Bordeaux.
Given that the Discovery was not mine, I wanted to make sure that she was tucked up as safely and securely as possible for our overnight. We had selected a lovely little boutique hotel in the centre but that meant parking was slim pickings. I did find a car park local enough to the hotel, and I even had the sense to check height restrictions and the height of the Discovery. If lowered, I could make it. I loaded Waze and headed over. When located, I had to almost launch myself across traffic to make the entrance, and, so committed, was now at the barrier with two cars to my rear, realising that this was a corkscrew entrance. Going the opposite way desired for a right-hand drive car. This was not in my plans. Or nightmares. When I say this was close, this was anus-puckeringly tight. Mere millimetres on either side, for THREE subterranean levels. It was so tight, the couple behind me stopped and gave me an enthusiastic round of applause when I was safely ensconced in a space. Genuinely, I am not sure that I have ever sweated more.
A lovely evening passed, a welcome sleep was taken, and a brief breakfast coffee was quaffed before I realised the reverse journey was now needed to remove the car. Three tight, opposite-side levels to the road, same clearance, same (perhaps greater) amount of sweat. But, I made it, both times. Testament obviously to my driving proficiency, but also to the manoeuvrability of a car the Discovery’s size. Yes, I stopped and gave the vehicle an orbit to make sure, but it threaded the needle of the car park with surprising dexterity.
The journey continued at French Autoroute pace until we crossed into Spain via San Sebastian, and then down through the Nevada desert. Speed diminishes somewhat in Spain, but a steady 120kph limit makes for swift and efficient progress.
The Discovery really is a comfortable beast. Large, armchair-esque seat. The aforementioned infotainment, which worked for the entire period without fault. Visibility at the raised height means that motorway journeys are simple affairs. Tight, urban spaces are also easily navigated as the high seating position gives good visibility to the front bonnet corners. It’s a simple car to place on the road and was adept across sandy beach car parks, urban roads (within reason), and broken and cobbled pueblo streets.
Three incidents of note were problematic, and please bear in mind this is across a period of seven weeks. Firstly, the previous car park tale was vaguely replicated in a couple of villages in Spain. Not to the same extent, but some reversing was performed. Secondly, in pursuit of some Instagram fodder, I had ventured slightly off the beaten track in Spain. Now, these were roads, but roads atop very high hills with incredibly tight carriageways, bends and occasional traffic, mostly in the form of locals but also the occasional tourist as white-knuckled as I was. Part of the problem was that in one direction, you are placed alongside what seems an impossible drop, and while there are protections in place, one is sat so high as to be unable to see them. You know that they’re there, but if you can’t see them… well, it’s rather stressful.
The third issue isn’t really an issue, more a mere sign that I am getting old. As a romantic at heart, I took the wife and dog for a date night at a drive-in movie theatre. Old school, open-air but advanced in that the soundtrack is transmitted to the car’s speakers (in this instance, a formidable 14-speaker Meridian system). One must, these days, do all possible to preserve the atmosphere, so engines are not allowed to run on idle. That meant every time the car switched off completely, the soundtrack broadcast came to a halt. I had to push the start button, which meant the car and the attendees in front of me were treated to a light show reminiscent of the best that Vegas can offer.
Having said that, if those were the major bugbears over nigh on seven weeks and almost three thousand miles, well, that has to be notched up as a job well done. The weeks were wonderfully spent. Paella, friends, waterfalls, beaches. The dog. All catered for at every turn by a pair of supremely capable machines.
The Land Rover Discovery was, throughout my journey, a chariot that saw off innumerable European highways. Traversed rock, sand and miniature Spanish roads with ease, and cut a dashing figure as it went. Couple that with the LeShuttle’s unrelenting service, speed, efficiency and pet-friendly nature, and one is set up to cover distances and make memories farther flung that our own isle… furry friends included, as they should be.
